Dalkey may be home to the rich and famous, including Bono, The Edge, and Enya, but what has Dalkey already done for you?
Somehow, Dalkey Island has just been revealed as the 7th most scenic place in Ireland by GoAdventure.com and the most beautiful in all of Dublin.
The travel experiences booking platform has released the list chosen by Ireland’s top travel photographers and Instagrammers, but we’re puzzled as to how Dalkey even made it the most scenic place in County Dublin. , one of the best in Ireland.
Here are seven reasons why Dalkey is a heap of nothingness and should be avoided at all costs.
1. Landscapes? What landscape?
Hope you’re ready for bland views everywhere you look – whether it’s on Dalkey Island or atop the Martello Tower overlooking the beautiful ocean.
No thank you, not for us.
2. Dreadful pints
Who wants a delicious pint of dark stuff at Finnegan’s or The Dalkey Duck?
We just can’t, in good conscience, recommend any of their beautiful pints – we’re sorry.
3. Who would want to live there?
Bono, Enya and previously the likes of Van Morrisson, George Bernard Shaw and the most famous and recently Matt Damon have all made Dalkey their home.
See? I can’t even support famous people here, why would anyone else want to?
4. The food?
Everywhere there are award winning restaurants these days.
Of course, there’s the Magpie Inn Gastropub with its 32-day aged steaks or seasonal menu and fresh seafood plus the 20 craft beers it offers on tap.
No variety in the place at all!
Or you can head to Ragazzi restaurant, voted one of the best restaurants in Dublin on Tripadvisor … but what would they know?
5. No story
Founded by the Vikings at the time, Dalkey was an active port in the Middle Ages. According to chronicler John Clyn, it was one of the ports through which the plague entered Ireland. Thanks Dalkey.
Then there is the Martello Tower, built as defensive towers against possible invasions. The vast majority of these towers in Ireland are built around Dublin Bay.
Just no fuss at the location at all.
6. Nowhere to shop
Barnhill Stores, The 3 Euro Bookstore, Rushe’s SuperValu, O’Briens Off License – you’ll soon run out of things to buy.
You can always go to The Courtyard which offers specialty gifts as well as the flea / street markets.
7. Where are the sports facilities?
There are no clubs.
Of course, there’s Dalkey United AFC, Castle Park Swimming Academy, Cuala GAA Club, Dalkey Hockey Club and Loretto Abbey Sports Hall plus a bunch of water sports to try along the coast, but who matters?
Do I have to say more?
Dalkey = no bueno.